Feeling Fabulous Friday: Frustration and Restoration

So, it's Friday again! The weekend has come and I should be excited, but...I'm not! I am tired, in pain, and mentally and emotionally spent. I know what you're thinking...I should at least be happy for two days to rest and relax. Well, you're probably right, but all I can think of right now is all of the work that I need to catch up on over the weekend. My mind fast forwards to Monday morning, and I think about having to relive the stress and exhaustion of this past week all over again.

Life has been stressful and challenging for us, especially in the last few months. You see, Mr. The King and I are facing a new challenge in our crazy maze of a life, right now. Well, it's not exactly a new challenge.. it's more like a new understanding of an ongoing challenge. Sharing about this challenge is sort of challenging in itself, but I feel like I need to share about it for the sake of my sanity and for the sake of any readers, both currently and in the future, who might face something similar.

For most of the 5 years I've been married, I haven't felt very well. I've had back, neck and hip pain, as well as regular headaches. Although, I've always loved to hike in the mountains, I've felt really bad for always holding my hubby back. My pace is slow, and I know he gets tired of hearing me complain of bodily aches most of the way. Working in an office has also been rather difficult for me because it hurts to sit in a computer chair for too long and it hurts to write. Add housework and other obligations into the mix, and you've got a nervous wreck and an accident waiting to happen. All of this has gotten exponentially worse over the past 6-8 months, and it has been very difficult to get comfortable, to rest, and function in my daily activities.

Last week, the doctor finally told me the verdict regarding my situation: I have Fibromyalgia.

Fortunately, I know that my life still has a purpose and I have a helper that promises to strengthen me to carry my load. I believe that each of us are given difficulties to go through so that we may better understand those in our world who are poor, helpless and hurting. When we hurt, we can identify with the hurting, and we are given an opportunity to minister and minister effectively.

Psalm 41:1-3 says:

¹ Blessed are those who have regard for the weak;
   the LORD delivers them in times of trouble.
² The LORD protects and preserves them—
   they are counted among the blessed in the land—
   he does not give them over to the desire of their foes.
³ The LORD sustains them on their sickbed
   and restores them from their bed of illness.

Psalm 41:1-3 NIV

That encouragement, that promise of God, is the only thing that makes me feel fabulous this Friday! I may be frustrated with my situation right now, and I may feel like surviving is the only thing I can hope for. However, God says that he will sustain me and restore me if I learn the lesson that he was trying to teach...Don't just think about yourself, think about and sincerely pray for those who are weaker!

Mr. The King always says this phrase that he learned from an ROTC instructor:

"Pain is just weakness leaving the body."

While I kind of understand the idea that is trying to be conveyed by this quote, I also disagree (biblically) with its negative connotation of the word weakness.

Listen to what Paul says about pain and weakness:

 ⁶ If I wanted to boast, I would be no fool in doing so, because I would be telling the truth. But I won’t do it, because I don’t want anyone to give me credit beyond what they can see in my life or hear in my message, ⁷ even though I have received such wonderful revelations from God. So to keep me from becoming proud, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger from Satan to torment me and keep me from becoming proud.
 ⁸ Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. ⁹ Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. ¹⁰ That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

 2 Corinthians 12: 6-10

I have been given a thorn in my flesh, just like Paul, but I know that in God's economy, weakness results in His power in our lives.  So, I can either call out to God to remove Fibromyalgia from my body, or I can accept the circumstances that I have been given and let God prepare me to receive more of His restoring and sustaining power.

I want to chose restoration over frustration, everyday! When I chose restoration, I am choosing to feel fabulous even in my weakness!

Lord, thank you for your promise to sustain and restore me! I chose to  believe that you're power is alive in me, and that I am on the road to wholeness!